A Month Late and a Dollar Short: The Last Flashpoint Friday

Flashpoint 5
Writer: Geoff Johns
Artists: Andy Kubert, Jesse Delperdang, & Sandra Hope
Rating: 2 out of 5 Pixels

In this finale that was meant to tie-up about twenty loose plot threads, introduce the biggest reboot in decades, and wow us all to pieces, Geoff Johns fails to deliver. Instead what we get is a story that takes us from Point A to Point B in a rather anticlimactic fashion, playing fast and loose with logic as it does so. Somehow, Barry saving his mother thirty years ago was "like a bullet shattering a windshield," altering time in every direction, in ways that no one bothers to explain. When the Flash runs, it's not so much about traveling from one place (or time) to another, but rather just the act of going really fast makes him magically appear wherever the story needs him to be, whether it's on his mother's couch or at his cosmic treadmill (which apparently exists in empty space, outside of reality) at the precise moment when he needs to be there in order to stop himself from saving his mother's life and thereby destroying the world. I can deal with these leaps of logic, though. Comic book laws of physics are typically... creative, especially when it comes to time travel and alternate realities. The thing that really bugged me about this issue, that made me just now drop the rating from 2.5 to 2 Pixels (even lower than I rated Red Hood and the Outlaws 1), is this scene:

See, Geoff Johns realized that if Barry decided to sacrifice his mom, even in order to save the entire world, he wouldn't come across as a hero. Rather, he'd come across as a douche who decided his mom's life wasn't worth everyone else's. So Johns writes in this scene where Barry's mom herself makes the decision to die in order to save the world, so instead of being the victim of Barry's douchery she's a hero, right? Except that this scene more or less comes out of nowhere, as far as characterization is concerned. We've seen Barry's mom for what, a few pages in the first issue or two of the series? If she was going to be the hero of this series, then she needed to be a bigger part of it all along. We needed to get to know her so that we'd understand that she's the type of person who sacrifices herself to save the world. We needed to care about her so that we recognize what this sacrifice means to her. Not what it means to Barry. Because this woman has been in the background for most of this series (as most women have), this scene comes across instead as her recognizing that she's not as important as the big (male) heroes, Flash and Batman and Cyborg, so she might as well just get out of the way so they can have their happy world back.

Sorry, Mr. Johns, I generally like your writing, but this just doesn't work for me. You created a (female) supporting character simply as motivation for the (male) main character, then tried to convince me that she's the hero of the story when in fact you just didn't want to make the main character look like a complete asshole. Bzzt. Try again.

Also, is it just me, or does Batman have a total double standard when it comes to fellow heroes who have tried to rewrite reality and in the process have killed innocents? Remember how he didn't forgive Green Lantern for years? This time, Flash tells him, "You know what? I just tried to go back in time and save my mom, but instead I created this new reality where millions of people suffered and died needlessly." And Batman is all like, "No worries, bro, it's cool."

Admit it, Batman, you just don't like Hal. It has nothing to do with him having been Parallax.

Day-And-Date: Teen Titans 1, Superman 1, Aquaman 1, Flash 1

This was a good week for comics. I enjoyed all four books I read and there wasn't any appalling hypersexualization of women in any of them. Good job, DC!

Teen Titans 1
Writer: Scott Lobdell
Artists: Brett Booth & Norm Rapmund
Rating: 4 out of 5 Pixels

I was pretty hesitant about this book after reading last week's Red Hood and the Outlaws, but I was pleasantly surprised by Teen Titans. Which makes me happy, because these are some of my favorite characters. I absolutely love Tim Drake here, as the veteran teen superhero trying to work behind the scenes, causing problems for the bad guys by blogging and wiki-leaking classified information. This is true to the character I have known since I first started reading comics. Bart Allen as glory hound isn't exactly as he's been portrayed in the past (he comes across a little more like the Timmverse version of Wally West), but it's not antithetical to his character in the way that sex-without-love blowup doll Starfire is, and there is a great moment where Bart demonstrates at once the impulsiveness of his Mark Waid era and the encyclopedic knowledge of his Geoff Johns era:

And then there's Cassie as car thief. Honestly, this doesn't seem out of character at all to me. Back when John Byrne first introduced the character, she became Wonder Girl by "borrowing" Diana's wig, gauntlet, and winged sandals. The character has always been a thief.

The overarching concept of the book, meanwhile, is a winner. In a world where people have superpowers, teenagers who have superpowers and do stupid things with them (regardless of good intentions) would be a real problem. The idea of teen heroes banding together to protect a world that fears and hates them is very X-Men, but it's enough of a twist on the concept that it doesn't feel overly derivative and in fact feels true to the core of Teen Titans. From the Fab Five (or was it Four at the time?) teaming up to fight their possessed mentors to Raven seeking out the teen heroes because the adults wouldn't trust her, the Titans have always been about superpowered teens coming together because grown-ups just don't get them. Thank you, Scott Lobdell, for not screwing this up.

Superman 1
Writer: George Perez
Artist: Jesus Merino
Rating: 3.5 out of 5 Pixels

I was impressed by how much bang this comic gives for my buck. Every page is packed with panels and every panel is packed with words. And then I remembered that George Perez wrote this, and (a) Perez comes from the old school where a 22-page comic should take more than five minutes to read, and (b) Perez likely writes as if he's going to be doing the art, and heaven knows he can pack a ton into a single page of art. I'm still digging Superman's new personality, which is a little toned down here compared to Action Comics, but that makes sense since this Superman is a few years older. He's still way more interesting than Superman has been in years.

Aquaman 1
Writer: Geoff Johns
Artists: Ivan Reis & Joe Prado
Rating: 3.5 out of 5 Pixels

In true Geoff Johns fashion, this comic is all about how awesome Aquaman is. It gets all metatextual with everyone being like, "Aquaman is lame" and "Did you see those SNL skits where they make fun of Aquaman?" and Aquaman is all like, "I'm too badass to even acknowledge your mockery of me." Not much happens, really, except that some Evil Creatures escape from The Trench and start Eating People (not sure why I capitalized that, it just seemed appropriate), Aquaman stops some bad guys, doesn't eat lunch, then tells Mera he's decided to live in the surface world. He doesn't really explain why, so one can only assume it's to prove to all the haters that he's the badassest superhero around. He does explain, however, that he doesn't talk to fish because fish are too stupid to talk, and therefore he has no problem eating them. I kind of dig this, as it goes against the obvious. I wonder whether Wonder Woman eats birds?

The Flash 1
Creators: Brian Buccellato & Francis Manapul
Rating: 3.5 out of 5 Pixels

This actually reads very much like a Geoff Johns-written comic, in a good way. You've got the character-defining bits of newly-revealed backstory, the off-beat sci-fi mystery, and the shocking last-page revelation. I'm not too bothered by the somewhat murky continuity, as all the necessary basics are here: Barry is the Flash, he's a CSI guy, he's kind of dating his coworker, and Iris West is a pushy reporter who will likely be the third corner of a love triangle. Also, not only has Barry stolen Wally's costume (a hybrid of his comics and animated costumes that actually looks pretty cool), but he also totally stole Wally's opening line:

Shameless, Shameless Superman

The solicitation copy for the recently-digitized Superman 713 reads:

What could possibly make The Man of Steel decide to stop being Superman? Superboy and Supergirl catch up with him in Portland, Oregon, and they want answers!

It just as easily could have read:

What could possibly make The Man of Steel decide to undress in front of his teenaged girl cousin? Superboy and Supergirl don't want to know!

Really, he couldn't have changed out of his costume before meeting them? This is a trend I've noticed not only with comic book characters, but with fictional characters across various media: nobody has any sense of shame about casually undressing in front of others. Not that I think people should be ashamed of their bodies--I think it's kind of silly when guys make a big deal about changing under their towel when in a men's locker room--but in my experience most real people are not so cavalier about displaying their bodies for friends, family, and random strangers to see. So why do writers of fiction feel compelled to write characters who are so entirely without shame? (Except for Supergirl, who is clearly ashamed of her cousin.)


Or do I just know the wrong people? Because if there are men who look like Superman who are in the habit of casually undressing in front of their acquaintances, I want to be friends with these men. (And what straight man would not want to be friends with someone like Wonder Woman who sleeps nude and has no qualms about getting dressed in front of random strangers who magically appear in her bedroom?)

Digital Horizons: Bringing the Mountain to Mohammed

A few examples this week of comic book publishers bringing the mountain to Mohammed, digitally:

Graphicly a new comic book app on Facebook, which I think is a pretty cool idea. As the linked article points out, people spend a lot of time on Facebook anyway.

This week DC announced two TV tie-series, Fringe and Burn Notice, each of which will be offered only in digital format. Another case of bringing the mountain to Mohammed, as the target audience for these books doesn't necessarily go to the comic book shop, but certainly spends time online (who doesn't?).

Finally, publisher SLG has announced that they will no longer print monthly titles but will release them digitally instead. Even more so than with big publishers like DC and Marvel, I see digital as the future of independent comics--these publishers can't depend on the comic shop crowd to keep them alive, so again it makes most sense for them to bring their comics to the web, where potential readers can find them more easily. It seems there's precedent for digital monthlies increasing the sales of graphic novels, too, so this strengthens the industry overall. Also, I like SLG's digital price point, $0.99, as that allows for more of the mountain to get to Mohammed, who's used to spending that much for music downloads so three bucks is kind of steep.

Digital Video: Young Justice "Terror"

Young Justice s1e11: "Terror"
Air date: September 23, 2011
Rating: 4 out of 5 Pixels

As I've come to expect from Young Justice, this episode was packed with guest-stars from the DCU: Hugo Strange, two Icicles, Killer Frost, Captain Cold, Mr. Freeze, that Brick guy from Judd Winick's Green Arrow, the Riddler, a handful of Justice Leaguers, and best of all, Amanda Waller. I don't say "best of all" because Waller is my favorite character or anything. Amanda Waller is an okay character who works well in certain types of stories--a story about villains trying to break out of Belle Reve being one such type of story. The "best of all" thing here is that Young Justice lets Amanda Waller be Amanda Waller, not Halle Berry:

Thank you, YJ, for recognizing that not everyone has to be skinny.

Apart from a faithful depiction of the Wall, this episode has a great infiltrating-the-bad-guys story with the same tension, character development, and suspense that this show has displayed in the previous ten episodes, and on top of  all that Superboy and Miss Martian finally kiss. This is not a coupling that I would have thought of, but it works. My only complaint is that this is the second episode in a row without Robin, Kid Flash, or Artemis. Here's hoping they return next week...

A Month Late and a Dollar Short: Flashpoint Friday

This week's flash reviews:

Flashpoint: Project Superman 3
Does it make it better or worse for the woman in the refrigerator to be self-aware enough to recognize that she's a woman in a refrigerator?

Personally, I'm kind of bothered that Lois sees herself as "the girl" and not "the hero." (Or, y'know, both.)

Flashpoint: Lois Lane and the Resistance 3
This book should have come out two weeks earlier. One scene leads directly into Wonder Woman and the Furies 3, which came out last week (speaking as if I'd bought all these books on their initial release date), and another scene leads directly into Project Superman 3, which came out the same week as this, but with no indication that I should read one before the other. Yes, I can put the pieces together even when read out of chronological order, but one of the appeals of a collection of miniseries like this is the connections between them and how they all come together to tell a larger story than each one tells individually. A little more planning in the scheduling department could have made that aspect work just a little better.

Flashpoint: Kid Flash Lost 3
I did not expect to see Max Mercury in this comic, nor many of the other references to Bart Allen's history. Sterling Gates clearly knows his Mark Waid. I would love to see a Gates-written Kid Flash ongoing. Also, Bart being the speedster to sacrifice himself in this universe-altering crisis? I didn't expect that. (Because, you know, he's alive in Teen Titans 1 next week.) Still, a nice touch.

Flashpoint: Hal Jordan 3
The end of this issue would make a great origin story for Carol Ferris, Green Lantern, who now has Hal Jordan as her very own woman in a refrigerator.

B'dg, the Cannibal Green Lantern

We take a break from our regularly-scheduled programming to bring you some very disturbing news: You know B'dg, that cute alien chipmunk Green Lantern who replaced Ch'p, who was also a cute alien chipmunk Green Lantern, one of B'dg's own species? (This is an important point, that B'dg and Ch'p are the same species.) Well, B'dg stars in one of DC's Super Pets line of chapter books for kids, Super Hero Splash Down. The book starts out with a profile page about B'dg. Here it is:

Did you catch this part?

Yes, B'dg is a cannibal. And apparently one who likes roadkill, since Ch'p was run over by a yellow tractor in Green Lantern: Mosaic. Be warned, chipmunks of the world. And stay away from salsa.